Pebbles

“Pebbles…”

by Lydia Crouch

don’t come down until

                     I toss

                                 this pebble

         prayer

                     into

                                 the

                                             water

stay asleep, please.

         I have a date here     

                     Who wants to hold my hand.

dear sweet family, stay asleep

         while evening yields to dawn

                                 leaving me this.

         this quiet moment when

                     I need forgiveness.

footsteps upstairs.  Why!?  Why is there no time?

no time for tossing prayer pebbles.

                     no time to bathe in the river of grace.

                                 no time to tell you all that’s troubling…

                                             I’ve failed you.

You pull a stone out of nowhere

                     and I know that stone.  I’ve seen it in

                     the hands of my enemy.  The one who led me

                     to sin and then smirks with stone in hand

                     delighted to accuse me.

but there you are drawing patterns of heaven

         in the sand

                     kneeling

                                 down at my level.

“Whoever is without sin gets to cast the first stone.”

                                 I am all sin. 

I’m going to die.

but my accuser had to bend to Truth

                     drop his stone,

                                             walk away.

But I’m still guilty.    

                     the deeds are done.

we sit beside the river.

“So where are your accusers?” You ask.

                     gone…

then the only one who could actually

                                 should actually

                                             bash me with that stone

                     hands it to me.

“Neither do I accuse you.  Go and sin no more.”

I stare at the stone.  “I should stay here and beat myself up with it. 

Put the stone on the mantle as a reminder of this moment – but He said ‘Go’”

“What do I do with stone?” I ask.

“It’s just a stone,” You say.  “Toss it in the river of my grace.”  You grin.  I can’t help smiling.  I pick up the stone.  My eyes catch Yours to ask “Really?”  You smile and nod.

                                 I toss.

                                             Splash!

                                                         sink!

                                                                     gone

                                                                             away.

I’m a child again.

         You hand me another one.

                     I toss.

                                 splash.

                                             sink.

                                                         Gone.

                     I’m giggling, gurgly tears of joy

                                             freedom backsplashes over me.

We toss pebbles until

                     there are none left.

                                 no one accusing.

                                             not even me

                                                         accusing

                                                                     me.

                                                                                 Gone.

into the river of grace

                             even the

                                         tiniest

                                                         pebble.

©2013 Lydia D. Crouch